6 Main Catagories of Body Language

Body language breaks down into 6 main categories - Posture, gestures, face, eyes, tone of voice and proximity.

1. Posture

Posture concerns the overall bearing of the body. It comprises the angle of the head, shoulders, hips and feet, direction and angle of inclination and position of arms and legs.

In general, people who feel comfortable with a situation and with themselves, raise their head and look openly at you. They may learn back slightly indicating that they are relaxed or lean forward slightly to indicate attentiveness.

People who are on the attack or who feel aggressive generally adopt a "full frontal" stance with head, shoulders, hips and feet all pointing at you. They will probably raise themselves up and lean forward in a dominating manner. Those who are feeling defensive will probably "close up" physically, making themselves smaller, hands and arms many protect their mouth or abdomen, legs may be crossed tightly. People feeling superior and arrogant may cross their legs openly (ankle of one leg resting on the knee of the other) and lean back with their hands clasped at the back of their head.


2. Gesture

People use their hands and arms in a variety of ways. Some gesticulate frequently and others hardly at all. Points worthy of note are:

• Arms can be used to signify self-protection and defensiveness when they are folded tightly across the abdomen, or they can be held down, with hands clasped casually together, to signify relaxation.
• Hands can be used to hide behind, covering part of the face or they can be used to demonstrate openness and honestly by showing open palms or they can be used to cut the air aggressively to emphasize points.
• Fingers can be used to fidget, as in drumming a table to show impatience or boredom or they can be used to jab the air pointing to you or they can be used to wag at someone like a schoolteacher talking to a naughty pupil or the can be wagged threateningly like a stick.

3. Face

Human beings have more control over their facial muscles than any other animal species in the world. As a result, the face is the most expressive part of our bodies.

The area around the ayes and mouth are the most expressive. Raised eyebrows and an "O" shaped open mouth signify surprise but raised eyebrows and an open smile indicate real pleasure. Knotted eyebrows and a down turned mouth signify sadness while knotted eyebrows and tightly purses lips signify displeasure. there is hardly a single emotion that does not show in the face in such a way as to be instantly recognizable by someone else.

4. Eyes

Although the eyes are part of the face, they are important enough to warrant specific mention. The effect of the eyes can be extremely subtle - we ten to feel uneasy about people with "beady little eyes" (that is, small pupils) - or it can be obvious as is the case with eye contact.

Eye contact is very important when dealing with peoples. If we avoid eye contact, we can give the impression that we are shifty, lacking confidence, disinterested or lying about something. If the eye contact is too intense, we could appear aggressive and make the people feel uncomfortable. If our eye contact immediate and moderate (about 50-70% of the time), we give an entirely different impression, especially if accompanied by a pleasant expression. We are effectively saying, "I am pleased to see you, I feel confident in myself, I am looking forward to enjoying our interaction."

5. Tone of Voice

Tone of voice is an important aspect of our communication. If it is too quiet and hesitant, people will infer nervousness on our part. If it is too loud, too fast and abrupt, people will infer impatience and so on. Whenever possible, you should pay attention to:

• Volume, so that you can be heard.
• Pace, so that you should enthusiastic, concerned, relaxed and so on, as appropriate.
• Pitch. A low, slow monotone can make you sound bored. A high, rapid voice delivered in fits and starts will make you sound nervous. Pitch therefore needs to be moderate and varied.

6. Proximity

The message we give by the proximity we adopt is dependent on the following points:

• A gap of more than 4 feet generally means that the people are not in contact with one another. Less that that and strangers get edgy.
• A gap of 2 to 3 feet generally means social/business interaction or joint activity, for example, when a sales person is demonstrating how something works.
• A gap of less that 18 inches generally means that the participants are friendly/intimate.

They are certain provisos on these points. Firstly, country people expect more personal space than city dwellers. Secondly, the situation makes a difference. No one expects the same amount of space at a crowded cocktail party or crowded elevator, as they would, say, in a business meeting. Finally, different cultures create different expectations. Scandinavians, for example, feel uncomfortably close at the same distance at which a japanese businessperson would feel uncomfortably distant.

Problem arise primarily when people fell their personal space is being "invaded". When they are expecting a business interaction, for example, and the other person enters their intimate zone, a favorite manoeuvre of aggressive people.